So today is finally Friday. I've a few things to discuss.
Recently I interviewed a bunch of people for a few positions open at work. I got to do 8 "sorry the position's been filled" calls. I hate doing that so much. :( I know people appreciate it though so they don't wonder. But man!! How freakin depressing! And the worst thing was, many of them were almost PERFECT for the job they interviewed for. One person for each of the jobs was hired...one person had a better "fit" than everyone else. That's gotten me to thinking. Job interviews are more about "fit" and if you come off as someone who is likable, that pulls more weight in an interview. Interviews are more about that than they are about qualifications. If I went solely on qualifications, I'm quite sure different people would have been chosen. However, once you have a person in a room with 4 or more people asking them questions and watching their every move, you learn much more about that person.
For example, a few years ago, I was on an interview team to hire a management level position. Two candidates were PERFECT on paper and one looked like he was a college dropout that couldn't keep a job. Once we got each person in and spent one hour with each in an all-about-you session, the guy who looked like a slacker actually got the job. I've heard he's still employed and has lead his staff to many improvements. In the interview, this guy was warm and funny without being creepy about it. He came off as very genuine and had very intelligent questions for us peppered throughout the interview. One of the "highly qualified" candidates was boring, short, and had an egotistical air about him that rubbed several members of the interview team the wrong way. The other was an over-excited over-achiever who never really answered a question at all...I can't even remember WHAT this guy talked about, but it was our longest interview. He also showed something I abhor and something that IMMEDIATELY turns me off: pandering or sycophancy. I can tell insincerity. I can tell "wayyyyy too eager". I can tell sleezeball. I will let you guide me on and I'll play your game for a little bit and you'll think you've got me...but I know. You not knowing I've figured you out??? Fatal mistake for you, my friend. I won't like you. If I don't like you, I don't want to build a team with you.
I'm reminded of that daily when I meet with students. Personality goes a long way. It's difficult to get through to a kid that the way they interact with an adult influences how much trouble they get into. Same goes with peer to peer relationships (don't get me started on bullying). It DOES matter if people like you or not. It really does. So it matters how you act and how you treat people. Now, the trick is to not obsess over whether people like you or not because there's a fine line to being bitter about it. No one has to like you...and definitely not every one has to like you. Suck it up, get over it & move on--because you cannot blame another person for liking you or not liking you. They do or they don't. Sometimes you and they just don't "fit". Same with love. You cannot make someone love you and you cannot get mad at someone who doesn't love you. That's a foolish waste of energy. They do or they don't. You have to find your "fit".
Suck it up, get over it and move on. Find where you fit.
Hey, let's get back to my title. So it's Friday. I'm old and my social life is pretty darned slow -and I like it that way (cue Dana Carvey's Grumpy Old Man character from SNL...). Friday nights for me are FANTASTIC if I can spend some down time and some "me" time unwinding while watching tv, listening to music, reading a book, chatting/texting now & then, or all of the above. I can go to bed when I want to, even if it's 8:30. And because tomorrow's Saturday, I can shut off my alarms and wake up when I want to. So what if I always automatically wake up on my own about 30 mns after my weekday alarm would go off? I don't have to get dressed until I want to and I can do absolutely nothing until my pot of coffee is gone. That's a beautiful feeling.
Have a good one, everyone!
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