Don't Breathe This!

Do you have some extra time to waste away? (quit laughing...I don't either!) Or maybe, are you stuck somewhere with only an internet connection and can't figure out what to do since you've checked your email a gazillion times already??? Maybe you don't have TV and to pass the time you surf uncontrollably and have lost parts of your life to YouTube and the I Can Has Cheeseburger.com empire. Well, here's a site for you. Blendtec's "Will it Blend?" site where Tom, the Blendtec guy, puts random things into a Blendtec blender to see if it will blend. Some are a little staged and far-fetched, but all are pretty much real and ALL are cool as hell. The very best part: At the end of each, he usually says "don't breathe this!" after taking the lid off & seeing dust/smoke come out.

Here's the link: http://www.willitblend.com/ and here's a sample for you!!



Geez. that was a lot of work. Time to go to bed!!!!

Hooray!!!!

I'm alive!!! I did not die while getting my gall bladder out. I didn't die on the way to the hospital, before surgery, during surgery, in recovery, or afterwards, OR even on the ride home. All in all, it was a quick, pleasant procedure and I was surprised. I think what helped is that after recovery, I took some time and slept in the day unit before I said I was ready to go. I slept longer than the surgery and recovery combined took. Anesthesia knocks me on my ass and I generally hate it. Being able to sleep it off for a couple hours afterwards helped quite a bit, even though I think they were trying to kick me out because they needed the room. I got home around 1:00 I guess and slept some more.

One of my best friends from highschool came over with her sister in law & niece to visit and pick up some stuff I found her for her wedding next week. That was a nice visit. Then I just laid around, reading, surfing the net, and talking to mom. Today I slept in a bit til about 8:30 and then took some more pain pills and went back to snooze for a little bit until getting up for the day at 9:30. I have much less gas pain today (from the CO2 used during the laproscopy) but much more incision pain/ache. It's like I did 200 situps AND have been punched in the stomach and side by little midgets all day. Nothing me and percocet can't handle though! I love that drug because it doesn't make me feel sick, doesn't give me a "hangover" headache like other narcotics do, doesn't knock me out unless I want to sleep, and most importantly it really really dulls the pain very well. Vicodin is a close second, but I get a weird headache after that stuff. Codeine makes me very ill so its pain relief is not worth the sickness/vomiting it causes in me. And Demerol makes me feel jumpy and weird while not touching pain one iota.

So enough of that. Let's get to the real reason you tuned in today. I know it was for a pirate joke, right? well, folks, there are only so many pirate jokes out there, so I may have to start repeating myself once in a while -probably not even on purpose either!

here you go:

What did the pirate say to the sales associate at Target?

Aye, just put it on me tarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrget charrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrge!!

This week is gonna suck. Monday & Tuesday will be great though, at least at work, because it's the data retreat (I'm a nerd), but Wednesday I get my gallbladder taken out. Yeeegads. Yuck. BUT, I'm VERY glad because I feel icky and have been in the "attack aura" most of the week and today was another tough day. I was thankful for pain pills. Beer and summer potluck food do not mix and my gallbladder doesn't like them because it insists on squeezing the living daylights out of itself and that upsets the little stones that are pissed because they were resting real nice there for a while and now they are swishing all over the place & passive aggressively telling the gallbladder to knock it off, "oh, well, then, I will just put myself right here in the duct so you can squeeze harder, how do you like THAT??". I do not like it. No sir, not one bit.

Let's see....what kind of humor would you like tonight? Are you sick of picture stuff? Probably, huh. It's been a while since I posted a pirate joke. I think you need a pirate joke. They are fantastic!

Enjoy!

Why are pirates pirates??
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because they ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!

A New Team To Join...

Many of you know of, and perhaps are entrenched in, the Twilight Saga. Which "team" do you affiliate with? Team Jacob or Team Edward? Well, don't forget this "Team". There's something magical about a Three Wolf Moon shirt...it turns guys into this guy. Then, it spawns fantastic humor! Enjoy...
(PS: the embedding code doesn't work, so just click on the "Watch on YouTube" link that appears after you click on the play icon in the screenshot; it will take you to the youtube site and it will play)

I wanna buy this car I think...

So I have an appt to meet with a surgeon on Friday to excise this demon they call a gallbladder outta me. Wooo hoo!!!

Here's a nugget of fun for you. I think I almost peed my pants when I saw this I laughed so much. If you weren't really a fan of hip hop or the Black Sheep (the rap group the song is by) you may not be as amused as me. However, the hamsters in this are as creepy as they are funny! Excellent marketing Kia!!

...and here we go again!

Remember yesterday?? The awesome day I had? I was looking forward to today. Well, today was going ok until about 1:30 when I started to feel icky. Then I started to think, "oh, no. Here goes that gall bladder again". Sure as shit, by 2:00 I was trying to walk off a gall bladder attack. 15mn into it, I knew it was going to be a long one, so I drove myself to the ER (I've learned my lesson with ambulances...if I can see, breathe, and swear well enough to make my Navy brother raise his eyebrows -I can make myself drive myself to the damned doctor).

Anyway, so I got there and I could not BELIEVE how slow and un-urgent the whole place was. I wonder if I came in bleeding from head to toe if that would have lit a fire under anyone's ass!! Holy canolis!! So I was finally in a room by 3:15 (I was waiting for a little over 30mn -me and 3 other people in the entire waiting room). Then I get the most sarcastic and bitchy nurse one could imagine and as I was in pain, I had no desire to deal with her "in good humor" so I was a huge bitch back. That was a mistake, because she had to put in an IV and it took her 20mn to do THAT. Finally, after sticking my hand, digging around (literally) my side wrist, and complaining on my small blood vessels, she put an IV into my right arm/inside elbow. OMG. Once she got it in, I said, "you know, I noticed that my blood pressure is pretty low (it was like 95/55), so maybe that had something to do with it". She stopped, looked at me and said, "oh. Yeah, you're right. I didn't even think of that". Shrugged and said, "oh well, it's in". So between the getting into the room and the "IV Incident" (as it shall be known as from this moment on), I waited for 45mn in my room watching tv before the doctor came in and in 5mn said, "yep, I think it's your gallbladder. We'll do an ultrasound and if you need some pain meds, I'll get those ordered for you right away". I said ok and "yes please!!!!!!!!!!!!" to the pain meds & he left. Then 20mn later the nurse came in and the IV Incident commenced. With no drugs, just saline. However, immediately after the IV was finally in place (remember, that whole process took 20mn), the ultrasound lady came in and for the 9th inning of the Twins game (I had the radio channel on the TV that was broadcasting it) -15-20mn or so?- I had an ultrasound of my entire upper abdomen. She was super sweet, super nice, and VERY professional. SOOOOOO, 30mn after THAT, I was getting PISSED because I was still in pain (this whole time it was a between 7-9 scale pain), so I hit the nurse call button. The doc came in right away and told me that I indeed have stones, the organs and everything else looks great, however, so he's not worried at all, was a bit dismayed to find I didn't have my pain drugs yet, and wants me to call a surgeon and get it taken out because he was discharging me. THEN, 15mn after that, I was just crabby as HELL, so I dinged the call button, and a different nurse came in WITH my drugs telling me my regular one was on break. I got an anti-nausea drug and 2mg of morphine pumped into my IV. FINALLY I was starting to feel better, though not really "drugged up" and that nurse was nice, professional, and very efficient. Then 10mn after that my regular nurse came in and asked if I wanted to go yet. Now I didn't feel like leaving because I was finally feeling ok and wanted to just lie there a while, actually not so much in pain. She kept coming back every 10mn!!!!!! Where the hell was she 2 hours ago!!! So I waited and waited until I finally felt like, yeah, I can walk by myself, I can do everything by myself and I don't feel lightheaded anymore. So I finally got out of there at 6:30, and walked down to the pharmacy to pick up my prescriptions (anti-nausea stuff and Lortab) and was out of there by 6:45.

So...that was my Sunday! What a waste of a day. Now I am waiting until the morphine wears off so I can take a lortab, but I think I'm just gonna go to bed and hope I don't wake up in pain. I've got to call a surgeon tomorrow and get this thing scheduled asap. I've got a short window to be laid up -once August hits, I've got to be really ready to roll.

So Mom, if you're reading this, don't freak out!!! And you don't have to call -I'm not dead nor am I in the hospital. I am a-ok, have good drugs, and won't know anything more than I've already written here until I am able to finalize a surgery date when I call Meritcare tomorrow. :)

On another note, I'm glad to be in Fargo for this -I don't feel as alone and I know I can get a cab at 3am here (lol -reference to my March gallbladder escapades in the index of posts). And, to make things a little creepy, I had JUST gotten my new insurance card from my new job YESTERDAY and had thought in passing, 'geez, I'm glad I haven't had to need this since I just got it 17 days after I started coverage'. I am very glad I chose the "regular" policy instead of the HSA policy and I am pretty sure I will hit my deductible AND my out of pocket expenses before the school year even starts now ($500 deductible then I pay 20% up to $900 out of pocket). Wooooo Hoooo!!! Free healthcare for me until next July! Haha. Not really cuz I pay for 65% of it myself.

No funnies for you today. Sorry! Not feelin it right now. :) Maybe later.

I had a fantastic day today! I can't believe that I have TOMORROW off too!!! Geez. i am working too much I think -or I'm too busy. This is ridiculous! :)

So I slept in a little-and by "sleeping in" I mean that I slept until about 8:00 and finally got out of bed at 8:30 after snoozin a bit. However, I still woke up at 5:45 like clockwork and thankfully I could get back to sleep. Then my friends from Ada picked me up around 11am and we went downtown to the street fair. I haven't been there forever!!!!!!!! It was fun. We ate at Juano's, which was sort of disappointing actually, but the pico de gallo is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO freakin delicious!!! I just throw that on everything and it's fantastic!!

I got home around 3-3:30 and got started on some laundry. Then, as the storms were brewing to the south of me, I got a bunch of stuff done on my "list": cleaned bathroom, did laundry (like washed blankets too that I had been stockpiling for "time" to wash them), sorted out my cupboards in the kitchen (and was VERY surprised at how much room I actually have here!!), along with a bunch of little things here and there. I took some breaks now and then to do stuff like eat supper, check emails/facebook, obsess about the radar, and update my ipod. Now it's 10:30 and I am drinking coffee. OOPS! ha! I want to buy a new coffee maker SO bad because the one I have now sometimes leaks or something and makes a mess if I don't have it sitting on a kitchen towel when I brew it. So I decided to try it tonight and I told myself that if it leaks and makes a mess, I could buy a new one tomorrow. Well, woe is me, because it didn't leak...at least not enough for me to notice. If I move it, I bet I will see stuff -black, slimy, sticky, half crystallized coffee residue or something along with a little pool of blackish liquid. I've had the thing for well over 5 years, so I guess it's time for a new one, since they surely don't make them like they used to!!

Anyway, tomorrow I have some work to do from the office, and then I have a few things I probably COULD do...I still have a bunch of stuff all over my spare bedroom that has piled up there as I've been getting everything else sorted out. I should get myself to church as well. If I get up early enough I'll go in the morning. If not, then I'll go in the evening and say hello to my old friends in the band. It will be nice to see them again and I can get back into the groove of things.

Oh! I need to get my car washed and cleaned out tomorrow too! It really needs it very very badly!!!

I've found another use for mindless TV: it quells the boredom and keeps me from thinking too much. I've found myself really restless in the evenings. Like right now, as a matter of fact. I want to go out for a drive.

My brain is all over the place tonight because I am gonna jump to stained glass. I've made two pieces so far in my lifetime and I was just getting geared up to start another project in Grand Rapids when the new job opportunity happened. I've been told that there are several places around town I can make more and Moorhead community ed often offers a class for that. I saw lots of fused glass art at the streetfair today and that was one of my goals to venture into next. Actually, before I do that, I think that I want to make some stained glass panels that will go up in my vaulted windows in the living room. I should start my designing right now and figure out where I'm going to create the sketches into glass art later.

So I bet you want a joke tonight? Maybe a pirate joke?? Hmmmmm.....let's see, how about a picture instead? Ok then, here you go -but no pirates in this one, it just made me laugh out loud:

I Think I Found Steve

Remember the last post? The list of "Ways to be cool"? Well, I bet this was the Steve the kid was talking out. Check out the drummer. I think I am in love with him.

Finally! Someone with Answers and a PLAN!!

This kid has it together, folks. Check it out (click on picture for a larger image):



....If only some guys I knew in high school had this list. *sigh* Especially the last item: "hang out w/Steve". Steve must be AWESOME. Oh, and "irony"...*SWOON*

LOL

Have a great day and thanks for tuning in!!!

Week One Finished!

Week one is finally finished! I'm taking a little "brain break" from reading a bunch of stuff my boss had set me up with earlier. My head hurts and I thought: I could go outside for a walk or I could do something else with my head to numb it for a bit. I am wearing BAD walking shoes so I decided to blog.

I have successfully finished one week at my new job. :) I love it. There are challenges -huge ones that will drive me crazy...this is NOT a utopia by any stretch of the imagination, but in a very strange, possibly twisted and obscure way, it is MY utopia. If that doesn't make sense to you, I'm sorry, but I cannot explain it. No, I'll be honest, I WILL not explain it. If you don't get it, you don't. If you DO get it, you are freakin COOL. :) Kudos you, smarty-pants; you are in good company, my kindred fellow(s)!!

Anyway, no funnies here today because I'm doing this entry from my work computer and I have crazy security on here. Actually, I'm surprised I could access this site. Haha!! Rest assured, though, every single key stroke is being documented and recorded for review later. I wonder what kind of job that would be....the person who goes through countless amounts of information a corporation generates everyday to ensure compliance of its personnel use policies. Ye-gads...I sure hope that position is paid well!!! I think reading articles on co-teaching and NCLB has given me temporary brain-drain -I could only imagine what that kind of job would be like!! :)

Ok, so I have been CRAZY TIRED lately. I think I might be dying. Seriously. I wouldn't be surprised if I get diagnosed with a terminal illness soon. Too much stress. Ick. Thankfully things are starting to come together in my apartment and in my office here. Pieces of my job are starting to "thunk" into place. My apartment is becoming my "home" more and more every day. I still feel like a visitor to Fargo-Moorhead rather than a legitimate resident, but I suppose that will come. Probably next week when I have to navigate road construction between the cities' major byways. But right now, all I want to do is go take a nap. I think maybe I will sign off of here and go for a walk...maybe go down to the front office and walk the "circle", visiting here and there. I went on a long lunch with my two partners in crime...there are three of us program managers, and three is a magic number...it was a good lunch. There is a lot for me to learn just about the "hidden curriculum"...the things that I can't learn from a manual, etc. I am brand new to this district and nearly everyone in a leadership position in special education has been here at least 5-10 years if not more (like since the dawn of time it seems!!!). In fact, one of my very first practicums was done with one of the teachers who is STILL teaching in the middle school/junior high level. That was probably 15 years ago! It's amazing to reflect on how far a person can go in 15 years compared to some people who literally stay the same in 15 years. I think that would drive me absolutely nuts. 10 years is one thing, but 15? wow.

So here's to getting more sleep, going on a quick refreshing jaunt around office in a few seconds, and continued growth & development! Oh yeah, I can't forget the challenges that make life worth getting out of bed for each day! :)

all moved in...probably, maybe.

I am *pretty much* alllllll moved in! I say pretty much because I have an old trunk full of old stuff and boxes of my graduate school junk at mom and dad's (that can stay there a while until I figure out what I need to have in my office & what I can just get shredded). Then I have some rubbermaid tubs of Christmas decorations, some rubbermaid tubs of "memories", and my Grandpa Rotta's old liquor cabinet at Albert's. I think that's it. All that stuff is just mainly storage for now. I still have my snow tires and trunk sandbags at a friend's house in Moorhead that I have to get out of there, but that can wait as well until he says "Get this out of my garage!!!!!!!!" haha.

I do not have places for stuff yet, but that's a process. I definitely have enough storage here. I'm kind of surprised at that because I didn't think that I had that much room here. I think that I actually have more storage space than I did at Grand Rapids. Less counter space in the kitchen, but definitely enough cupboard space. That is awesome!!

I did not hook up any cable or tv of any kind here in Fargo. Right now I'm going nuts! I found out that although I won't really miss out on live shows (except baseball...), I really like the tv to zone out to. I can't believe how much time there is in a day without mindless tv watching! I think I did this once before, but I'm not sure...I'm going to try to hold out as long as I can and not hook up any kind of cable. I will do the "bunny ear" thing or whatever that is now so I can get at least one local channel-I feel more secure with that. Also, I have to talk to the office manager about how I can hook up to the building's system without cable so I can have a look-see at who's downstairs in the entryway wanting to get in.

I've got to say, I'm really enjoying my decision to take the Moorhead job and move to Fargo. I got my ND drivers license on Friday and not only was it CHEAP ($10), it was also test-free (I had to surrender my MN license to them -but that meant NO test!) AND they print them off RIGHT away, so I was there for 30mn. 20mn waiting in line and 10 for the application stuff & picture. Then I left with my license in hand! I had bad allergies that day so I kind of look stoned in the picture...but whatever! I am hoping my plates & tabs are cheap and easy to get. Also, Moorhead's "internet for employees", their "extranet" is great and what I expect of an employer-everything is right there to access and you don't have to go through 2-6 different people who each aren't sure or who each contradict themselves. I guess that's important to me. I expect quality out of my employer because I know they expect the same out of me. I think that kind of stuff helps employees do their jobs better. And being new, it is a God-send.

I have to apologize but I don't want to put any funnies on this post. I'm funny-ed out I think...kind of in a funk and I don't want to get into it right now. I kinda wish I had tv so I could zone out, but I have a bunch of stuff to find places for in my kitchen before tomorrow night. Thankfully, I will FINALLY get a haircut. It's been a while and it's a wild beast on my head -it sure has gotten long, though. Wow. I don't think it's been this long since 1991!! and back then it was permed.

So anyway, thanks for tuning in. Sorry this was pretty boring-that's kind of how life is right now. :)